At the end of the last blog and Sovereign Soul Podcast episode, I touched on parenting - conscious parenting—and I’m diving deeper because this is something that"s very near and dear to my heart.
I’m a single mom of four. Single for years—I don’t parent from obligation or some resigned "life happened to me" place. I parent because I love these humans. I chose them. And every day, I choose them.
The Weight of "Mistakes"
I grew up believing I was unwanted. A "mistake." And that hurts alot when you are a kid, and can be massively damaging. Bless my parents—they did what they knew. But this is what my childhood taught me, and I vowed never to pass on to my kids:
1. My kids will never feel like a burden.
2. They will never question if they’re wanted.
3. They will never doubt they’re loved.
My life when my kids were young wasn’t some serene walk in the park. My oldest son and I endured a painful separation because of his father. I’ve weathered divorce, rebuilt from nothing, and raised three babies born back-to-back—twins a year after their sister. I’ve been the solo parent in a new country, drowning in nappies and sleep deprivation. No support, financial instability, and a rocky marriage.
It was hard, absolutely. But that's life, and it wasn't my kids fault, nor role to carry any burden from those circumstances. The being a mom part was not a punishment. Parenting becomes magical when you surrender to the choice you made to be a parent and have a child.
For me, conscious parenting isn’t about bubble baths and "balance" for the parent. It’s about:
- Owning your role without resentment.
- Teaching emotional intelligence by living it.
- Raising confident kids who know boundaries, kindness, and how to exist without apologising for taking up space.
Your kids don’t need a perfect parent. They need one who’s awake. Who heals their shit so they don’t pass it on or vomit it onto their children.
Two Truths to Parent By
1. There’s No Such Thing as a "Mistake" Child
Sex = a potential baby. Full stop. Even in the darkest circumstances, own that this tiny human is here because you chose—consciously or not—to create them. They’re not accidents. They’re people.
2. Your Emotions Are Yours
Throwing a tantrum because you can’t control your kid or your temper or mood? That’s your trigger, not your kids fault. Stop manipulating guilt ("Mommy’s sad because of you, or You have made me so cross") unless you want kids who blame themselves for everyone’s moods.
The Bottom Line
Parenting is a mirror. It shows you where you need to grow. My kids are my why. They push me to be better because they deserve better than what I had.
So own your choice. Own your healing. And for fuck’s sake, stop being a victim to your children!
To dive deeper, listen to The Sovereign Soul Podcast here.
With love,
Rose
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